Ending your Chorus with THE Hook/title could emphasize it, and make it more memorable. That would give you two 'hits' on THE Hook, per giving of the Chorus, so four. Ideal minimum is said to be five. Adding one or two to the Coda, the final Musical Movement could give you five or six.

@gary-e-andrews

You're right, Gary, and you make a good point, but it's not that kind of song. The title works as a hook, I think, because it's unusual and because of the double alliteration that most folks won't consciously notice. On the other hand the message comes at the end of the verses and that's what I chose to repeat in the coda. Concentrating on hitting the hook repeatedly would seem a bit contrived or trite and jar with the style of the song. I'm breaking every rule and I don't care LOL.

It's really pretty, I love the guitar. A very sincere expression of love for your child. Normally, I don't like the sincere and straightforward songs because I usually prefer something indirect or somehow twisted. But this is a really good song anyway. I didn't realize you were Irish, that is such a nice accent! She is a very pretty Irish lass.

Thank you, Polly. I'm with you for the most part. Most of my songs are from the head and maybe have a twist to them or rely on wordplay. Occasionally, one comes from the heart and pretty much writes itself. For that kind of song, if you really feel it, I think it's best to be straightforward, dispense with the cleverness and just be sincere. I think people respond pretty well to that, probably because it's hard to fake.

I'm Scottish, not Irish, but my wife is Irish. We had better Scottish names in mind if we had boys and Irish for girls, although the name Niamh is also found in Scotland.

@gavin

Oh, I guess I am not too good at identifying celtic accents. Either way, it's nice. I think you can get away with straightforward and sincere with a song like this, because it is beautifully done. I have heard many straightforward sincere songs that just don't make it, in my opinion.

I don't agree that non-straightforward songs can't be from the heart also. Mine are, it's just that my heart is twisted.

@polly

I didn't mean to suggest that songs that aren't straightforward can't be from the heart, just that this approach works for me. It's one way to directly connect emotionally with the listener, basically bypassing the intellect. It's not something I can do often. In fact I've probably only done it a couple of times. I agree that other approaches can work just as well.

Gavin . . . some honestly cool acoustic music, and really well played and sung here . . . I really liked this. From a songwriting point of view . . . because it's just vocals and guitar, you need to make that chorus stand out more obvious . . . but that's only my "marketing" brain speaking . . . it's just a great listen from a proud Dad to his Daughter, the lyrics convey exactly what you feel, well done.

(A side story . . . when I saw the name Niamh, I knew exactly how to pronounce. Used to work with a gal named Niamh (here in Canada) . . . when people called to ask for her, or emailed, they always botched it . . . so we used to to say "it's Neve, rhymes with Steve")

Thanks for listening and the kind words, Popitup. Yes, the name Niamh is not exactly common in North Carolina either! She is always having to tell people how to pronounce it and holds us responsible for that 🙂 Her sister Aoife has the same problem.

I get what you are saying about the chorus. I could add harmonies, but I don't want to lose the intimacy. Need to think about it. 

Enjoyed Da Listen. Beautiful song.One twisted heart to another Love it.