Ok fixed it.thanx

Nah post them to get feedback and Improve them. Look at it tomorrow

OK, I'll say this here but not at "that other site..." It's the whole premise of this lyric I have a problem with! I can't even imagine myself singing and playing this in front of a crowd!

"I was driving the girls insane"

"They all wanted the big pay day"

"Lead guitar is what makes stars"

"Every girl loves the guitar man"

OMG, What Arrogance... LOL! You could easily end this lyric with, "Then I woke with my dick my hand". I really think you should shoot for something more mutual between the crowd and that soul-wrenching guitar solo 😉

True. Sometimes I write total craps.

Maybe Jack Black can pull it off lol 🙂

Tried to delete it from both sites but no luck!

Lol... Let's salvage this... New Working Title:: "She's the reason Cowboys play guitar" ? 

Think along the lines of "Good hearted woman in love with a good-timing man" 😉

Ok trashed it and re-wrote it.

Everyone loves the guitar man

Verse

We listen and we’re mesmerized

By what we see and hear.

It’s magic to his audience.

Pure pleasure to the ear.

Pre chorus

He’s no double oh seven

He’s not a rock star

He’s no Eddie Van Halen

But he plays guitar.

Chorus

We marvel at the skill of his hands.

Everyone loves the guitar man.

Verse

He’s toying with our emotions.

With each note that he plays.

His guitar’s like a messiah.

We’re waiting to be saved.

Pre chorus

He’s no double oh seven

He’s not a rock star

He’s no Eddie Van Halen

But he plays guitar.

Chorus

We marvel at the skill of his hands.

Everyone loves the guitar man.

Bridge

He frees our imagination.

He sets our heart and soul free.

His solos are incantations.

Recited on six strings.

Carroll . . . not just to be contrary, but I like the original version (as posted at the top here, with edits) way better ! The second version is watered down in comparison, and lacks the character, and the sense of fun I felt reading the first version.

JAPOV makes a good point, that as a guitar stage performer, it might be difficult to make this work, what would they think ? (if they could even hear the words) . . . but, somehow, from a music listener point of view, with a few tweaks, it could totally work.

Anyways, I've cut and pasted the original version to my notes . . . for next time I get out my electric guitar.

Bridge (suggestion)

"Lead guitar is what makes them see stars

With the crowd that hangs out in bars"

I just think it could be a fun rock song.

popitup

Lol... This could totally be a load of fun, if it was intended to be! Would make a hilarious "Big Hair and Makeup" video 😉

Well it was supposed to be till you roasted it

I was just having fun with it . if you want to use it that way that's how it was intended.

I usually don't much care what critics say but I guess you got in my head on this one.